Ayub Hits A Huge Milestone With His First Birthday Party Ever

Every year since Ayub was 3, I’ve asked him if he’d like to have a birthday party with friends. Every year he said no. His reason was, “I don’t have any friends.” It wasn’t such a big deal for us, especially because he was so little then. But when he was 5, 6, 7, 8 years old and still didn’t have friends, I felt a little sad.

Friends are awesome. In a way that family can never be. You know what I mean? Family is awesome too, in a way friends can never be. The relationships are different and equally awesome. And he was missing out on friendship.



Ayub has never had friends before

As I mentioned before, maintaining friendships wasn’t a big deal for Ayub. He never understood the need for friends. For Ayub, his family is all he needs. But I’m not going to be here forever, and I’d like to know that Ayub will have a support system of good friends around him when he’s older and I’m gone. And that he has the skills to make and maintain friendships.

He’s never been invited for playdates or to birthday parties. I guess other kids (and possibly their parents too) thought he was “weird” or “uncool” because he is so very different and special. It’s ok.

Earlier this year, I asked him who he sat next to during lunch. He replied that there was a “together table” and an “alone table” and he sat at the “alone table” while everyone else sat at the “together table” during lunch. I asked him how that made him feel. He said he liked it because they were too noisy and talked too much. Again, sound is his main trigger, so I was happy he was happy. But at the same time… Ahhhh…

Planning Ayub’s first birthday party

This year, Ayub approached me and said, “Mama it’s going to be my birthday!” I know, I replied. “I want to have a party with all my friends!”

Never has Ayub asked to be part of a social gathering, let alone asked to have his classmates (or anyone) over to the house. I couldn’t believe it. In my mind I was planning a big treasure hunt in the park, or party games at home, or laser tag at eCurve, or a LEGO birthday workshop…

Ayub: I want it in our house.

Me: Oh ok.

Ayub: I don’t want games.

Me: Awww…

Ayub: I want lots of balloons.

Me: Heh?

Ayub: Lots and lots and lots of balloons! Because they are so fun!

Me: Ok. But maybe you wanna do something else? Otherwise your friends might be kinda bored just playing with balloons?

Ayub: Hmmm… we can watch Netflix. And play with the kittens.



Ayub’s Netflix, Kitten, and Balloon Party

The kittens:

The kids started to arrive at 10am. We brought the kittens upstairs so they wouldn’t be scared. They were also celebrating turning 1 month old.

autistic child social skills birthday party

From left to right: Bego Cream Cheese, Fatty O, Mini Genji aka Baby G, Jelsa aka Black Panther I, Jelly aka Black Panther II.

All up for adoption so please leave a comment if you want one 😛

autistic child social skills birthday party

When the kids arrived, Ayub would bring them upstairs to meet the kittens. They were a huge hit among party-goers. Haha. All the oohs and aahs and petting and stroking made both kids and kittens happy.

The Netflix:

We bought 7 packets of popcorn the week before in preparation – cheese, chocolate, and caramel. After the kitten party, the kids flicked through Netflix and voted on what to watch.

autistic child social skills birthday party

I wasn’t around for the voting process but Mr Ninja was laughing about it because apparently Sulaiman was completely outvoted on his nomination of LEGO Ninjago. Anyway, for whatever reason, Inspector Gadget the cartoon series won. The kids totally binged the hell out of the show.

Lots of popcorn was devoured. Really, all of it.

autistic child social skills birthday party

Aisha was super excited to see so many kids and mostly tumbled around the beanbags and stood in front of the TV and ate as much popcorn as she could get her grubby little hands on.

autistic child social skills birthday party

The balloons:

I was introduced to Supa Dupa Circus. Their services include balloon twisters, magicians, giant bubbles, and clowns. Absolutely love love love them. Cannot recommend them enough. They offered to build two Pokemon balloon columns but it was too much for our little living room. Maybe next time.

From inside the house the kids spotted a giant Pikachu floating towards the house and they just went mental.

Ayub opened the door for the balloon twister who was instantly cornered as the kids oohed and aahed over all his very many balloons in his super fat balloon pouch.

Poor guy could barely walk through the door. He started creating stuff pretty much instantly. He didn’t even have a chance to put his things down properly. Hahaha. He’s wonderful.

autistic child social skills birthday party

Birthday boy got the first balloon. He asked for a sword. Sulaiman was next. So, of course, he asked for a sword.

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

Things start to get interesting when the lovely balloon artist decided to not give in to the third request for a sword and instead made a dinosaur.

autistic child social skills birthday party

After a while the kids wanted to get back to Netflix. So as they watched Inspector Gadget, Supa Dupa Circus balloon twister dude was literally left behind, twisting balloon creations by himself.

autistic child social skills birthday party



The Supa Dupa Circus balloon creations

autistic child social skills birthday party

Aisha posing with the Supa Dupa Circus signature unicorn hat, two cars, a monkey and his banana, a unicorn, and a T-Rex.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Balloon cars!

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

One of the kids asked for a bow and arrow so… big black cock.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

rawr.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Unicorn hat is the coolest.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Many many weapons were made that day. Including at least 3 guns.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Unicorn!

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Monkey needs a hug.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Once the kids realised they could ask for anything… the demands got more demanding. Oh, Snorlax. Lol.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

I choose youuuuu!

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Adam posing with the unicorn hat. Like a dumbass.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Me posing with the unicorn hat. Like an even bigger dumbass.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Aisha asked for a blue car <3

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

Aisha just looks cute here.

supa dupa circus balloon twister malaysia

The bow and arrow legit works.



Pizza party!

Pizzas arrived at noon. I love how all the kids are busy devouring food and you can see Mr Supa Dupa Circus making balloons in the background. Must have been the Pikachu. Don’t worry. We gave him a whole pizza and breadsticks and chicken wings and cinnamon bread after.

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

Nom nom nom nom nom nom!

Bubble time and party bags

Gowri and I packed party bags for the kids the day before with chocolate, lollipops, candy, biscuits, seaweed, vitagen, and bubbles! Yay bubbles! BUBBLES ARE THE BESSSST!

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

The after-party

After Netflix and kittens and balloons and bubbles and pizza and popcorn, Ayub opened his presents and the kids were just havoc in the house. I loved it. So wonderful having children over for the first time. Lots of talking and screaming and bouncing and jumping and chess.

autistic child social skills birthday party

Aisha super enjoyed her party bag. Her mouth turned blue after sucking on M&Ms.

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

autistic child social skills birthday party

She truly has the makings of a dictator… or a sith lord. So proud.

Thank you for coming to Ayub’s party

This milestone wouldn’t have been possible had it not been for the Acton KL community. Guides, parents, and the amazing children. Never has there been such a safe place for Ayub to be himself and not be reprimanded for it. This family has really been blessed by having so many supportive and loving people surrounding us. I’ve run out of words.

Ayub has never been so happy and confident in himself. I love him.

autistic child social skills birthday party



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Laila Zain

Laila is a working mama who married young, had two beautiful boys, went through a shitty divorce, met an amazing man, remarried, and had a beautiful girl. Her eldest boy is a rainbow baby and special needs child. Her second is ridiculously smart. Her baby is a baby.

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